In August of last year I posted a piece about my father. Therein I examined the ways in which he is a slice of God. He became this slice by choosing to live in grace, to walk by faith, to thirst for God, to live obediently, to practice the presence of God, to be a humble servant, and to live compassionately.
His health is failing rapidly now. I drove up yesterday afternoon to spend time with him. It is clear that he is nearing the end. There are moments of confusion and mumbling. There are also times of coherent conversation.
In one of his more coherent moments we talked a little about life and faith. I asked him, “What do you want me to tell my readers?” Without hesitation he said, “That whether you believe or not has no impact on the truth.” This is a 95 year old with congestive heart failure and a fever, yet, speaking from the heart, his words were sharp and to the point.
He caused me to ask a couple of questions. How much of what we believe has been manipulated to conform to our notions of what truth looks like? Do we deceive ourselves into thinking we have any impact on truth whatsoever? Granted, all of us are on journeys to uncover truth, but are we willing to uncover all of it, even the evidences that shake our foundations? Close to the end of life, Dad still challenges us to seek truth, not construct it.
Now I sit by this image-bearing slice of God, watching him slip away. My emotions are raw and mixed. I will deeply miss this man, mentor, friend, and father. But I know he is ready to move on. He has earned his degree. He has fought the good fight. He has lived and loved. He has endured the tensions between doubt and faith. He has walked with others down the same path. He has even carried some along the way. And now, his quest is almost over.
No, it is just about to begin . . .
-Sam Augsburger
